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The Rediff Interview/ Gladys Staines

'I've forgiven them. I only hope they don't kill any more'

Gladys Staines is a woman of unusual courage and conviction. Though her husband and two young sons were murdered in Manoharpur, she has decided she won't return to her native Australia. Instead, she has taken up her husband's unfinished work and today looks after the Mayurbhanj leprosy mission.

And his killers?

She has forgiven them, she tells Pritish Nandy Excerpts from the interview.

Why did you decide to stay back in India, in Orissa to continue the work your husband was doing? Are you not afraid for yourself and your young daughter?

It is God's wish you could say. Why should I go away? Graham spent more than three decades working out here. We met and married here. How can I leave India and go back to Australia? What will I do there? Here, at least, my work has been cut out for me. All I have to do is carry on what Graham did.

Before he died Graham had this plan to set up a 40-bed referral hospital largely for leprosy sufferers, who had nowhere to go for reconstructive surgery. They need specialized attention, specialized care. The local administration has been very helpful in allowing us to make it a reality. Many people were talking about a memorial for him. What better memorial can there be than setting up what he wanted, carrying on his work among the local community?

Has the experience scarred you badly? Do you fear for your safety?

No. If I did, I would have gone away. In fact, it is just the opposite. I have had tremendous support from the people. Where Graham was killed is 160 kilometres from us. The Baripada people have been very supportive. So has been the administration, the local town people. Graham was very popular there and so the people out there are upset. The only way they can show this is by being supportive of what we are doing there. There is a general acceptance of the fact that I am there and shall continue the work he was doing.

Did it upset you that his killers roamed around free for so long?

I said at the very beginning that I had forgiven them. I only hope that they do not kill any other people, regardless of who they are and what they are doing. As human beings, we have no business killing anyone.

Have you ever wondered why they felt so strongly against your husband, why they struck out so brutally?

I do not know why they did it and I no longer worry about their motives. I am sure they know why they did it. I have not actually spent much time thinking about it. It does not bring Graham and my sons back.

They have gone to the Lord. I would much rather carry on with our lives, our work and keep Graham's mission alive. That is what is most important.

What brought you to India?

I just knew that God wanted me to come here and do something to help those who suffer. I am a nurse and I am trained for this. It began with someone I knew in Australia who had come from India. All he ever did was talk about India, India, India. That is when I felt God was showing me a direction, a purpose for my life. That is why I am still here, Mr Nandy.

Otherwise, I would have packed up and left a long while ago. This is the place where I belong, where God wants me to be.

Have you ever felt tired, frustrated, unhappy enough to want to go back home?

Not really. In the early days, it was the sense of adventure that kept me going. Actually when I first came to India, I did not even know what to expect. I had heard all sorts of stories. But I did not even try to check them out or read any books on India. I was clear: I would accept whatever there is. Whether it was difficult or easy did not worry me in the least.

I had made up my mind. You see, we came from a farming family that was not exactly well off. We were seven brothers and sisters. Most of the time we wore second-hand clothing but it did not bother us in the least.

We lived in Queensland, 50 kilometres southwest of Brisbane. My father was a simple dairy farmer. We milked the cows, grew vegetables in our small kitchen garden, tilled the earth, made hay.

My birthday is in June and June was the end of the financial year out there. It was so difficult making both ends meet that, invariably, my parents would tell me, 'Sorry, Gladys, we could not buy you a present this year.'

After paying off the year-end debts, there's no money left! But that did not bother me. Our parents showed us lots of love and that is what mattered. We lived happily with whatever we had. So coming to India was no problem at all! In fact, it was like magic to me.

Why magic?

Well, it was so different! One thing I could not believe was how people wasted so much water. There was very little water in the farm where we grew up. We had to put up tanks to store it. Bath meant one mug of water at the most. So it amazed me to see people using two buckets of water to bathe and wash their clothes in India. This was, for me, the land of plenty!

What are your fondest memories of Graham Staines?

His commitment to God's work. He was never too busy for anyone who came to see him or seek his help. He always had time. He would get up from his meal to attend to a sick person. He would gladly give up his sleep if the patients were too many. He loved working for the sick and the poor, those who had nothing to call their own. He believed in God's work. He had faith in it and in himself. That is what made him so special.

You speak so much about God and God's work. Were you not angry when God let you down, when he took away your husband and children in a way that was so brutal, so painful?

That was God's way and why should I complain? It is all over now and no amount of complaining can bring Graham or the children back. We must now learn to live out our lives in his absence in the best possible way.

By carrying out his mission and God's wishes. That is what I am attempting to do and God gives me strength to face this every day. No, I am not angry. I am just a little sad. I am sad that all this had to happen.

Do you want the guilty punished?

Initially I wanted it. I wanted it badly. But then I saw how important it was to move on with life. What does one gain from retribution? Nothing but more pain. I am sad for those who did it. They must have had their own reasons. I only hope and pray to God that they have had a change of heart now and will not kill anyone else. As for us, we must carry on with our lives and see that God's will is done. That is most important. It will keep Graham alive in the heart of the people.

The Rediff Interviews

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