hy would a guy who is nearly broke, insist on footing the bill at a plush restaurant?

And why would the empowered woman of today smile coyly and revel in the chivalry?

Nature does have a sense of humour, indeed. And more often than not, the joke is on the guy.

Guys, if your version of the MasterCard ad is, "There are some things my money can't buy, and God knows how hard I try," this one is for you!

Here are some fun ways to go on a date without wiping your bank balance/ pocket money.

~ A movie to the rescue!

Surprise her and go catch a matinee show at any cinema of your choice. The rates are nearly half the regular prices. Pamper her in the interval with some popcorn and a cola.

After the movie, take her to an ice cream parlour and share a sundae.

Nature has been kind enough to bless women with, at best, moderate appetites. So if you throw in a samosa during the movie, your girl is well fed and entertained for the day.

But if you are both movie buffs, that's trouble. Cinemas could get expensive as weekend entertainment options.

Go to any local video parlour and rent the DVD or VCD of your choice. It cuts down half your expenses.

And, hey, who knows? She may decide to surprise you the next time by bringing the movie herself.

~ Sharpen your culinary talents

This plan never fails. Invite her over to your place for a meal.

Set up the props: the lacy tablecloth, the candlestands, the slow music.

Most important, make sure that one item on the meal list is prepared by you. Bear in mind that the chances of her enjoying the meal are higher if you have stuck to preparing just one item.

Throw in a rich slice of dessert that will make her feel she has eaten the entire evening.

A slow dance to soft music would set the mood perfectly for the date.

And it will not burn a hole in your pocket.

Next time, suggest that she cook. Maybe you can even gift her a cookery book and ask her to experiment.

All you have to is take a bottle of wine (or a dessert) over to compliment her adventurous Italian cookery.

~ A stroll is always romantic

If you are not exactly the scheming kind, take her out for a stroll by the sea or in a park, perhaps even on a boat ride.

Pick up a packet of chips and a candy bar along the way. The key here is carrying a small gift, neatly wrapped with you, with which you surprise her during your time out.

Please note: it must not be an expensive gift!

If you make that mistake, you will have to shell out dearly during birthdays and anniversaries.

Don't worry. She will love it.

It is the thought that counts. After all, it has been gifted without any occasion.

~ Ouch! Too many hints about the new joint in town

Some things are inevitable. And a new disco or restaurant will beckon you both sooner or later.

Fret not! Start the evening by inviting her over to your place.

Be cordial and offer her some snacks and a soft drink. Then gaze lovingly in her eyes and mention that it has been a long time since you have taken her out for a quiet dinner. (Note: Before you mention the dinner date, make sure most of the snacks are consumed!)

The rest will fall into place like clockwork. The dinner is more about her chatting with you than with the waiter, and the evening will fit comfortably in your budget.

Now if both of you are seriously into food as a pastime, trust the buffets around town. What they may lack in ambience, they more than make up with sheer quantity and cost efficiency.

If you happen to be serious party animals, try going out on a 'girls free' night. Also, opt for the places that have a minimal cover charge, so that you end up paying only for what you eat and drink.

~ It's not about food, honey!

Take up a sport together.

Go bowling (preferable around late afternoon to early evening -- the entry fee is somewhat cheaper).

Go swimming. Enroll for tennis classes. How about a dance class? Maybe you can try the salsa?

Ever wanted to learn a musical instrument? Convince her to learn it, too. It is by far the most constructive and enjoyable time you will spend over an extended duration.

If all else fails, get radical. Embrace the women's' movement, body and soul. Keep harping on the remarkable strides women have made in all spheres and how they are more than equals.

If she still does not catch on, suggest subtly that for the cause of all womankind, you would prefer if the both of you went Dutch on all your dates.

But be warned. Such ploys have faced severe repercussions in the past. You would be this daring at your own risk.

~ Some last words

Remember, the ideal date is not your chance to become a privileged diner or boost our economy with your lavish spending.

It is to do things to surprise her.

i. Pick her up sometimes, instead of just meeting at the venue.

ii. Instead of taking a bunch of flowers, take one rose with a few greens and a little note attached.

iii. Switch off your cell phone or at least keep it on the silent mode (make sure she sees you doing it).

iv. You will find these thoughtful gestures go a long way in making up for the lack of expenditure.

Happy (cost-effective) dating!

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